The Booke of Demeanor

Stand straight vpright, and both thy feet

together closely standing,

Be sure on’t, ever let thine eye

be still at thy commanding.

Observe that nothing wanting be

which should be on the bord.

Vnlesse a question moved be,

be carefull: not a word.

If thou doe give or fill the drinke,

with duty set it downe,

And take it backe with manlike cheere

not like a rusticke Lowne.

If on an errand thou be sent,

make haste and doe not stay,

When all have done, observe the time,

serve God and take away.

When thou hast done and dined well,

remember thou repaire

To schoole againe with carefulnesse,

be that thy cheefest care.

And marke what shall be read to thee,

or given thee to learne,

That apprehend as neere as may be,

wisdome so doth warne.

With stedfast eye and carefull eare,

remember every word

Thy Schoole master shall speake to thee,

as memory shall afford.

Let not thy browes be backward drawn,

it is a signe of pride,

Exalt them not, it shewes a hart

most arrogant beside.

Nor let thine eyes be gloting downe,

cast with a hanging looke:

For that to dreamers doth belong,

that goodnesse cannot brooke.

Let forehead joyfull be and full,

it shewes a merry part,

And cheerefulnesse in countenance,

and pleasantnesse of heart.

Nor wrinckled let thy countenance be,

still going to and fro:

For that belongs to hedge-hogs right,

they wallow even so.

Nor imitate with Socrates,

to wipe thy snivelled nose

Vpon thy cap, as he would doe,

nor yet upon thy clothes.

But keepe it cleane with handkerchiffe,

provided for the same,

Not with thy fingers or thy sleeve,

therein thou art too blame.

Blow not alowd as thou shalt stand,

for that is most absurd,

Iust like a broken winded horse.

it is to be abhord.

Nor practize snufflngly to speake,

for that doth imitate

The brutish Storke and Elephant,

yea and the wralling cat.

If thou of force doe chance to neeze,

then backewards turne away

From presence of the company,

wherein thou art to stay.

Thy cheekes with shamefac’t modesty,

dipt in Dame Natures die,

Not counterfet, nor puffed out,

observe it carefully.

Keepe close thy mouth, for why, thy breath

may hap to give offence,

And other worse may be repayd

for further recompence.

Nor put thy lips out like a foole

as thou wouldst kisse a horse,

When thou before thy betters art,

and what is ten times worse,

To gape in such unseemely sort,

with ugly gaping mouth,

Is like an image pictured

a blowing from the south.

Which to avoyd, then turne about,

and with a napkin hide

That gaping foule deformity,

when thou art so aside.

To laugh at all things thou shalt heare,

is neither good nor fit,

It shewes the property and forme

of one with little wit.

To bite the lip it seemeth base,

for why, to lay it open,

Most base dissembling doggednesse,

most sure it doth betoken.

And so to bite the upper lip

doth most uncomely shew,

The lips set close (as like to kisse)

in manner seeme not so.

To put the tongue out wantonly,

and draw it in agen,

Betokens mocking of thy selfe,

in all the eyes of men,

If spitting chance to move thee so

thou canst it not forbeare,

Remember do it modestly,

consider who is there.

If filthiness, or ordure thou

upon the floore doe cast,

Tread out, and cleanse it with thy foot,

let that be done with haste.

If in thy tale thou hammering stand,

or coughing twixt thy words,

It doth betoken a liers smell,

that’s all that it affords.

To belch or bulch like Clitipho,

whom Terence setteth forth,

Commendeth manners to be base,

most foule and nothing worth.

If thou to vomit be constrain’d,

avoyd from company:

So shall it better be excus’d,

if not through gluttony.

Keep white thy teeth, and wash thy mouth

with water pure and cleane,

And in that washing, mannerly

observe and keep a meane.

Thy head let that be kembd and trimd,

let not thy haire be long,

It is unseemely to the eye,

rebuked by the tongue.

And be not like a slothfull wight,

delighted to hang downe

The head, and lift the shoulders up,

nor with thy browes to frowne.

To carry up the body faire,

is decent, and doth shew

A comely grace in any one,

Where ever he doth goe.

To hang the head on any side,

doth shew hypocrisie:

And who shall use it trust him not,

he deales with policie.

Let not thy privy members be

layd open to be view’d,

It is most shamefull and abhord,

detestable and rude.

Retaine not urine nor the winde,

which doth thy body vex,

So it be done with secresie,

let that not thee perplex.

And in thy sitting use a meane,

as may become thee well,

Not straddling, no nor tottering,

and dangling like a bell.

Observe in Curtesie to take

a rule of decent kinde,

Bend not thy body too far foorth,

nor backe thy leg behind.

In going keep a decent gate,

not faining lame or broken,

For that doth seeme but wantonnesse,

and foolishnesse betoken.

Let thy apparrell not exceede,

to passe for sumptuous cost,

Nor altogether be too base,

for so thy credit’s lost.

Be modest in thy wearing it,

and keep it neat and cleane,

For spotted, dirty, or the like,

is lothsome to be seene.

This for thy body may suffice,

how that must ordred be:

Now at the Church thou shalt observe

to God how all must be.

[Sloane MS. 1986, p. 193, ab. 1450-60. The last page
mentions the 19th year of Henry VI., A.D. 1440-1.]

INcipiunt statuta familie bone Memorie dompni Roberti Grossetest, lincolnie episcopi.

Let alle men be warned þat seruen ȝou, and warnyng be ȝeue to alle men that be of howseholde, to serue god and ȝou trewly & diligently and to performyng, or the wyllyng of god to be performed and fulfyllydde. Fyrst let seruauntis doo perfytely in alle thyngis youre wylle, and kepe they ȝoure commaundementis after god and ryȝthwysnesse, and with-oute condicioñ and also with-oute gref or offense. And sey ȝe, that be principalle heuede or prelate to alle ȝoure seruauntis bothe lesse and more, that they doo fully, reedyly, and treuly, with-oute offense or ayenseyng, alle youre wille & commaundement that is not ayeynys god. T the secunde ys, that ȝe commaunde them that kepe and haue kepyng of ȝoure howseholde, a-fore ȝoure meynye, that bothe with-in and with-oute the meynye be trewe, honest, diligent, bothe chast and profitabulle. ¶ the thrydde: commaunde ye that nomañ be admittyd in ȝoure howseholde, nother inwarde nother vtwarde, but hit be trustyd and leuyd that ȝe be trewe and diligent, and namely to that office to the whiche he is admyttyd; Also þat he be of goode maners ¶ The fowrethe: be hit sowȝht and examined ofte tymys yf ther be ony vntrewman, vnkunnyng, vnhonest, lecherous, stryffulle, drunke*lewe, vnprofitabulle, yf there be ony suche yfunde or diffamydde vppon these thyngis, that they be caste oute or put fro the howseholde. ¶ The fyft: commaunde ȝe that in no wyse be in the howseholde men debatefulle or stryffulle, but that alle be of ooñ a-corde, of ooñ wylle, euen lyke as in them ys oon mynde and oon sowle. ¶ The sixte: commaunde ȝe that alle tho that seruen in ony offyce be obedient, and redy, to them that be a-bofe them in thyngis that perteynyñ to there office. ¶ The seuenthe: commaunde ȝe that ȝoure gentilmen yomen and other, dayly bere and were there robis in ȝoure presence, and namely at the mete, for ȝoure worshyppe, and not oolde robis and not cordyng to the lyuerey, nother were they oolde schoon ne fylyd. ¶ The viij: Commaunde ȝe that ȝoure almys be kepyd, & not sende not to boys and knafis, nother in the halle nothe oute of þe halle, ne be wasted in soperys ne dyners of gromys, but wysely, temperatly, with-oute bate or betyng, be hit distribute and the[n] departyd to powre meñ, beggers, syke folke and febulle. ¶ The ix.: Make ȝe ȝoure owne howseholde to sytte in the alle, as muche as ye mow or may, at the bordis of oon parte and of the other parte, and lette them sitte to-gedur as mony as may, not here fowre and thre there: and when youre chef maynye be sett, then alle gromys may* entre, sitte, And ryse ¶ The x.: Streytly for-bede ȝe that no wyfe be at ȝoure mete. And sytte ȝe euer in the myddul of the hye borde, that youre fysegge and chere be schewyd to alle meñ of bothe partyes, and that ȝe may see lyȝhtly the seruicis and defawtis: and diligently see ȝe that euery day in ȝoure mete seson be two men ordeyned to ouer-se youre mayny, and of that they shalle drede ȝou ¶ The xi: commaunde ȝe, and yeue licence as lytul tyme as ye may with honeste to them that be in ȝoure howseholde, to go home. And whenne ȝe yeue licence to them, Assigne ȝe to them a short day of comyng a yeyne vndur peyne of lesyng there seruice. And yf ony mañ speke ayen or be worthe, say to hym, “what! wille ye be lorde? ye wylle þat y serue you after ȝoure wylle.” and they that wylle not here that ȝe say, effectually be they ywarnyd, and ye shalle prouide other seruantis the whiche shalle serue you to youre wylle or plesyng. ¶ The xij is: command the panytrere with youre brede, & the botelare with wyne and ale, come to-gedur afore ȝou at the tabulle afore gracys, And let be there thre yomen assigned to serue the hye tabulle and the two syde tabullis in solenne dayes; ¶ And ley they not the vessels deseruyng for ale and wyne vppon the tabulle,* but afore you, But be thay layid vnder þe tabulle. ¶ The 13: commaunde ye the stywarde þat he be besy and diligent to kepe the maynye in hys owne persone inwarde and vtwarde, and namely in the halle and at mete, that they be-haue them selfe honestly, with-out stryffe, fowlespekyng, and noyse; And that they that be ordeynyd to sette messys, bryng them be ordre and continuelly tyl alle be serued, and not inordinatly, And thorow affeccion to personys or by specialte; And take ȝe hede to this tyl messys be fully sett in the halle, and after tende ye to ȝoure mette. ¶ The xiiij: commaunde ȝe þat youre dysshe be welle fyllyd and hepid, and namely of entermes, and of pitance with-oute fat, carkyng that ȝe may parte coureteysly to thoo that sitte beside, bothe of the ryght hande and the left, thorow alle the hie tabulle, and to other as plesythe you, thowȝght they haue of the same that ye haue. At the soper be seruantis seruid of oon messe, & byȝth metis, & after of chese. ¶ And yf the[r] come gestis, seruice schalle be haued as nedythe. ¶ The xv: commaunde ye the officers that they admitte youre knowlechyd men, familiers frendys, and strangers, with mery chere, the wh[i]che they knowen you to wille for to admitte and receyue, and to them the whiche wylle you worschipe, and* they wylleñ to do that ye wylle to do, that they may know them selfe to haue be welcome to ȝou, and to be welle plesyd that they be come. ¶ And al so muche as ȝe may with-oute peril of sykenes & werynys ete ȝe in the halle afore ȝoure meyny, ¶ For that schalle be to ȝou profyte and worshippe. ¶ The xvj: when youre ballyfs comyn a-fore ȝoure, speke to them fayre and gentilly in opyñ place, and not in priuey, ¶ And shew them mery chere, & serche and axe of them “how fare owre meñ & tenauntis, & how cornys dooñ, & cartis, and of owre store how hit ys multiplyed,” Axe suche thyngis openly, and knowe ȝe certeynly that they wille the more drede ȝou. ¶ The xvij: commaunde ȝe that dineris and sopers priuely in hid plase be not had, & be thay forbeden that there be no suche dyners nother sopers oute of the halle, For of suche comethe grete destr[u]ccion, and no worshippe therby growythe to the lorde.

¶ Expliciunt Statuta Familie bone Memorie.

[From the Rawlinson MS., C. 86, fol. 31,
in the Bodleian Library.]

Vtter thy langage wyth good avisement;

Reule the by Reasoun in thy termoȝ alle;

Mystruste not thy frende for none accusement,

Fayle him neuer at nede, what so euer befalle;

Solace þi selfe when menn to sporte þee calle;

Largely to speke be wele ware for þat cause;

Rolle faste this reasoun & thynke wele on þis clause.

What mann þou seruyst, alle wey him drede;

His good as þyñ owne, euer þou spare.

Lette neuer þy wylle þy witt ouer lede,

But be glad of euery mannys welfare.

Folus lade polys; wisemenn ete þe fysshe;

Wisemenn hath in þer hondis ofte þat folys after wysshe.

Who so in youthe no vertu vsith,

In age alle honour him refusith.

Deame þee best in euery doute

Tyl þe trouthe be tryed oute.

It is þe properte of A gentilmann

To say the beste þat he cann.

Si vieȝ dolere tua crimina die miserere

Permiserere mei frangitur ira dei

F. S.[eager]

Anno. 1557.

Dispise not councel, rebuking foly
Esteme it as, nedefull and holy.

¶ the Auctours Name in Verdyt.

S Saye well some wyll by this my labour

E Euery man yet Wyll not say the same

A Amonge the good I doubt not fauour

G God them forgeue For it me blame

E Eche man I wyshe It shall offende

R Reade and then iudge Where faulte is amende

Face aut Tace.